Friday, March 20, 2020

COVID-19 A Reader's Journey Tuesday 3.17.2020

Looking for Positives in the Pandemic

I'll admit--I went to the noon meeting of my spiritual group yesterday.  My friend promised we'd be small (4-5 people).  We ended up with eleven, way above the recommended limit of five.  I won't return in person and will use online meetings instead.  But, the meeting gave me the opportunity to reformulate my thinking about this social distancing campaign and how I reconcile my own thinking and emotions to our new reality.

First, I'm changing the way I think about my own decisions.  I found myself feeling bad about my decisions to back out of group events.  Most weeks I attend at least six to eight face-to-face events.  Now that's all in past-tense.  I used to attend all those events.  It was very hard to back out.  In some cases, the decision was made for me by closures.  In others, I had to announce it myself.  For a while, I was very worried about offending my friends and colleagues.  It was as if I was telling these people they were germ-ridden and a danger to me!  That is until I was discussing my feelings with a friend (by phone).  She wisely observed that I was setting boundaries for myself, not others!  Funny, after I decided to back out of one of my last group activities I immediately got a phone call from one of the members thanking me for taking the first step.  Phase one of changing my perspectives to a more positive view.  I also came to understand that I needed to be responsible about my contacts to protect my family.  My two children, one significant other and their father all have at least one sort of auto-immune condition that puts them at higher risk. 

Later I was looking out the front window onto the street and was able to observe a lovely grouping of what looked like three families with young children in conversation.  They were observing the six-foot distancing rule.  Suddenly I realized that in the past few days I've seen and experienced an increased feeling of community.  The foot-traffic in neighborhoods has dramatically increased.  For example, three high school girls walking with their lacrosse sticks down to the park to practice.  Normally they would be at the school practice field and invisible to their immediate neighbors.  Checking with my health-challenged neighbor before I went to the grocery.  Phone calls from friends when normally we only text.  Chatting with an old friend I haven't seen for years during the 7-9 am grocery store's "seniors only" shopping hours.  I'm blessed to be in a low-infection state, at least so far.  Some of these activities will not be possible in higher density communities or areas with high infection rates. 

Shutting down our busy lives is making it possible for us to relax a bit and reconnect with our communities.  Having to focus on our networks and evaluate our "risk" also makes us aware of our potential threats to others.  Thus, stepping back is actually a gift to our friends, neighbors, and families.

Finally, I want to offer a shout out for the creative social consciousness of many of our local stores.  They have come up with special "seniors and vulnerable populations" shopping hours.  Their consideration of the community is greatly appreciated.  It's way too easy to focus on the negatives of our situation.  Egregious examples of irresponsible behavior are being published far and wide.  I hope that we can also celebrate the more positive examples of care that come our way.




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